I used to be a creative person.. Creative, like really.. I used to write poems and short story.. I used to draw clothes designs.. I used to write soulful things in my diaries, stuffs about life and like that.. The thing is, I was a thinker.. But I think I kind of loosing it now.. I think I lost my mojo..
I don’t know what caused it.. Maybe growing up took over everything, your time, your dignity, your freedom.. Meredith Grey once said that growing up sucks.. Yeah, it kinda does.. Once you grow up, you see the differently.. Some things that didn’t matter for you become do matter, while some things that did matter to you become don’t anymore..
Responsibilities take over everything.. You spend less time to see how wonderful life is, and take more time to see how screwed up it is.. It happens to me, at least.. Couple of days ago I tried to start writing a short story again, after a really long time.. And I couldn’t.. I stuck.. And how can it happen to a person who once thought about sending her stories to teen magazines?? Let alone drawing another cloth design.. I never good at drawing anyway, but still I drew.. And now I no longer can..
Does it really have something to do with growing up? Or is it just me not pushing myself to try harder? Or is it just me letting unimportant things enter my brains and dry it up? Or is it just me letting so-screwed-up universe take over my pure soul? Or is it just me letting life pass me by?